Headlines

Headlines, just one letter short from being head lies. There have been a lot unbelievable ones lately.

COMMUTER TRAIN ACCIDENT IN LOS ANGELES KILLS 25.
(L.A has commuter trains?)

JOHN MCCAIN PICKS SARAH PALIN AS HIS RUNNING MATE.
(The woman who believes Noah’s Ark is a true story?)

DAVID FOSTER WALLACE HUNG HIMSELF.
(Well, that one is believable.)

It really is a tome of meticulous madness. The world, not Infinite Jest.

Football season is underway and at least that will restore some normalcy. Grown men pounding into each other so we can express our latent, tribal reflexes and grill meat in the back of our pickup trucks. Americans are fuckin’ tough, or if we’re not we pay someone to be tough for us. I’ve been on a shopping kick lately and I don’t why. I bought some bowls. With handles. Or else they are over-sized coffee mugs. They came from Pier One. Wrapped in thin brown paper. I filled one with Frosted Flakes. Poured in some milk and found out the milk was sour. It was one of those days.

SCIENTIST DISCOVER ICE CREAM ON MARS.

WRITER IS EXHAUSTED. GOES TO SLEEP.

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