Notes From The Ant Empire #6: Plane Crashes, Heath Ledger, and Who Let the Dogs Out?

Heath Ledger dies of apparent overdose on pills and the world asks, “why wasn’t it Britney?” Some people are saying it was suicide. His father otherwise.

In the Australian city of Perth, where Ledger was born and raised, his father called the actor’s death “tragic, untimely and accidental.”

All we know is that a talented actor is dead.

These days, everything you read and hear about is apocalyptic doom. The decline of the dollar. Global Warming. Islamic Terrorism. We should remind ourselves that we’re more likely to meet our end the old fashion way: Heart attacks. Cancers. Shot by an arrow.

We’re all caught up in a fatalistic fixation of some future calamity. Certain of certain chaos…

Lately, imagined death is on everybody’s mind, maybe a real death will remind us we all got some living to do in the meantime.


In true Ant Empire bizarreness, Mitt Romney asks a group of black kids “who let the dogs out?”

On Martin Luther King Day! Proving my point. Mitt Romney is half robot/ half 1950’s sitcom dad/ half slimy protozoa.

Yeah, I know that’s a mathematical impossibility, but it’s Romney. The man’s amazing!

At first, I thought, Romney’s a Mormon, he doesn’t seem to be in touch with pop culture, maybe he truly wants to know “who let the dogs out?” Maybe it was just an innocent, sincere question.

But then he added the woof woof at the end.


Two planes collided over Corona the other day, raining debris down on a used car dealership. In related news, there is a deal on a new Altima if you’re in the market.

Am I the only one that is surprised that this kind of thing doesn’t happen all the time? Fuck going to the moon, I’m shocked every time the 747 I’m riding in is able to lift all the ground and defy the laws of physics, at least how I know them.

More enlightenment coming my way; the reporter interviewed other pilots and they said the freak accident could have been because it was a clear day.

John Elwell, who has been a pilot for 42 years, said sometimes clear days can be more challenging that those that are overcast.

“The sunlight is the biggest problem because it is in your face and it impairs your vision,” Elwell said.

Put that down on the list as one more thing that could kill you: a clear day.


When we were down in New Zealand and Australia my wife collected sea glass she found washed up on the beaches. I was recently in the Mojave and noticed the abundance of brown, clear, and green desert glass.

Pieces of Michelob, Corona, and Heineken.

Tales of our civilization will be written on bottles of beer.


If aliens do come here to Earth, it’s obvious they don’t want to be seen or bothered. It’s obvious they want nothing to do with us.

I can’t blame them.


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